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Spurs fans celebrate a win at Wembley |
’Ere we go! The best football chants I know
They can be witty, critical and offensive, but Spurs fan Chris Parker’s book reveals how football chants often provide social commentary,
writes Dan Carrier
SPURS fans: you will remember Northern Irish international, the multi-talented Gary Doherty.
Okay, so the current Norwich City star was not the most gifted footballer that has ever graced the sport. Actually, he was a tiny bit rubbish.
But we loved him – like his team-mate, the German Steffen Freund, it didn’t really matter that he was frankly not of an acceptable standard. He tried, and he was so proud to be in the Spurs team. You could see it when his pale legs with ginger hair all over them wobbled out on the pitch and in his freckly grin whenever he touched the ball. He was one of us.
He was not a good footballer but he had spirit. He played like one of the fans would (maybe slightly better, but still, you’d feel you could match his ability if on the top of your game, and if he was having a bad game), and therefore he was living our dream.
Then, one day, out of the blue something odd happened.
The “Doc”, as he was known back then, was playing up front against Sunderland. He was normally employed as a centre-back, but hey, this was George Graham’s Tottenham and, as well as having a lack of strength in the squad, Gooner Graham cared little that Doc was ill-suited to be the silky frontman we were used to. “Bung the lump up front,” Graham would say, “and we’ll whack the ball up there for him to wave his head at”.
So what happened? The ball comes into the box, there is a bit of a scramble, the ball falls to the ground. Doc controls it, sidesteps a challenge and wallops it into the top corner. We were thoroughly stunned and the whole of the Park Lane end starts singing: “One ginger Pele, there’s only one ginger Pele...”
It took off. OK, so it’s hardly got the lyricism of Lennon and McCartney, but it caught on and stayed. Whenever the Ginger Pele was in the team, we’d let him know of our towering affection.
So I was quite chuffed to see a new and giggle-inducing book published called One Ginger Pele, about cheeky chants on the terraces, and even happier to discover the author is Spurs fan Chris Parker.
Dehumanising and homophobic chanting by Spurs fans is rightly coming in for condemnation at the moment, but we mustn’t let that stain the cruel but good-hearted wit of the vast majority of chants.
Chris decided to commit these to print because he believes they are more than just a way to let off steam – they are part of modern folk language.
“I’ve always loved the atmosphere of a football match,” he says.
“The banter between friends in the local pubs and cafés, the sense of anticipation as you walk into the ground, the grease in your belly from the burger van heart attack in a bun.
“Then there is the ritual of buying your programme, the squeeze through the turnstile and the wave of sound that hits you as you walk up the steps and emerge from the depths of the stadium and out onto the stands.”
Chris says the things he recalls most of all about going to games as a child was the noise of the crowd: “There is a sense of unity, of belonging to a group that has one joint cause: to sing your hearts out and support your team. That is why each weekend more than a million people turn up and sing.
“But while the basic reason for singing might be quite simple, the songs themselves are often very clever: satirical, witty, sometimes absurd, and, most importantly, downright funny. Poet Laureate Andrew Motion has even described the body of football songs as a ‘huge reservoir of folk poetry’.”
Of course, Chris acknowledges that they are not always Shakespearean calls for the No 11 in your shirt colours to do their upmost to win the game cleanly, fairly and with a dollop of flair. Of course, many are downright rude and offensive.
“Chants give a running commentary on the game, the goings-on on and off the pitch and are an insight into popular culture and events of the time,” he says.
Just don’t give this book, as Chris writes in a disclaimer at the beginning, to your gran. With some rather rude asides, it is best kept to the pub or the terraces.
Top of the Terraces
Sung by Spurs fans to Chelsea supporters, post the Abramovich takeover....
(to the tune of Lord of the Dance)
Tax free, wherever you may be
We are the Nouveau CFC
So please sit down
So my wife can see
I’ve been a fan since February.
To the Colchester United goalkeeper called Dean Gerken (tune of Guantanamera):
Stayed in a burger, you should have stayed in a burger...small nasty pickle, you’re just a small nasty pickle... liked in McDonalds, You’re not even liked in McDonalds...
To Joey Barton, of Newcastle United, who is frequently in trouble with the law
(He’s got the whole world in his hands)
He’s got his IQ, on his shirt, He’s got his IQ, on his shirt, His got his IQ on his shirt.
Celtic fans, playing in Italy:
Deep fry your pizzas, we’re gonna deep fry your pizzas...
To Dave Tilbury, of Southern League’s Windsor FC, who is also a decorator
(Ta-ra-ra-boom-de-ay)
We’ve got Dave Tilbury,
He’ll paint your house for free,
He quotes and estimates,
He paints and decorates.
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