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THE CROW by RICHARD OSLEY
Published: 1 November 2007
 
Let Juande carry on in the comedic Spurs tradition

SO long Martin Pumpkinhead, we will miss you and the many laughs you brought us. We laughed at the size of your huge head for many months. Then we laughed at the astonishingly bad cup defeat to lowly Grimsby instead. We laughed at the missing out on the Champions League due to a dodgy lasagne. These things only happen to Top Four Tottenham.
We laughed at your inability to beat Arsenal – even when you cheated (the players were injured on the floor when you scored that goal, Arsene Wenger should have chinned you). We laughed at the leads that were thrown away. The FA Cup win against Chelsea that might have been. The Carling Cup semi-final in which you were embarrassed by Arsenal’s youth team. We laughed at your voice, which at times sounded like a bad Grolsch advert. The signing of Darren Bent for more money than it costs to buy Thierry Henry. The names of your brothers, Dick and Cock. We laughed at the time you said you could chin Arsene Wenger if he squared up to you on the touchline. We laughed at the club’s 125th anniversary celebrations which amounted to falling 4-1 behind to Villa. We laughed and we laughed and we laughed. It was all cheap stuff but what made it fun was that you seemed to take it all in your stride. You were one of the Premiership’s characters and you were treated disgracefully by aclub, which preaches about its glorious traditions but usually comes up lacking in class. You probably had to go but not like this. May Juande Ramos, bring just as many near misses, awful defeats and reasons to laugh out loud.



• The New Journal is inviting readers to tackle Osley in The People’s Perch. Send your column and a photo to The Crow, 40 Camden Road, NW1 9DR or by email sports@camdennewjournal.co.uk

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